Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Most disgusting thing in the world...
Yesterday morning I woke up with that terrible, tingling sensation in my upper lip. At first I thought it was my imagination, but before long, I realized that it was indeed that feeling that I hadn't missed at all in the last two years. It was, definitely, a coldsore. Now, if anyone out there has ever had one of these, you know that it is not fun. You feel like hiding in your house until it is completely cleared up. And, in fact, you even feel like hiding from the people/dog in your house, for fear that you will become the recipient (and cause) of one of the most disgusted looks of the year. Well, alas, I am an adult and cannot hide in my deep dark basement for the next week. I must face the world...big disgusting coldsore and all. I can't help but praise God this time though, because this time I am not getting married the very next day! That's right...two years ago, on May 13, I woke up at 6 in the morning with that same tingling feeling in my lip. Of course I panicked because my dream of being a beautiful bride was about to be shattered! I ran to my friend Kellie who is a pharmasist and asked her for something that would clear up a coldsore in 24 hours. She gave me some stuff that I thought worked and it was (mostly) cleared up by the wedding. Whew! Thank goodness for makeup, is all I have to say! Today, though, I am more certain than ever that it was God who saved me from my coldsore on my wedding day, because the medication that I received from Kellie has not been working at all this time! I have a huge top lip and am quite ugly (self-proclaimed...Nathan continues to insist that I am beautiful despite not being able to kiss me). So that is my story. It is sad, but true. So, if anyone out there would mind sending up a prayer for my lip, that would be great. I have a wedding to be at on Saturday in Hudson Bay (yeah, road trip with my sister!) and would love to be looking beautiful...Nathan won't be there to convince me otherwise if I am not. Thanks alot, guys. Have a great day!
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Being alone vs. Being alone
Last night I was writing in my journal and was thinking about the two sides of being alone. On one hand, there's solitude.
Solitude: A spiritual discipline, designed by God, and practiced by Jesus, created as a means of developing and growing an intimate relationship with the Creator.
I have enjoyed practicing solitude very much in my life. When I was in high school, living on the farm (a secluded 10 acres with the closest neighbour being 1/2 a mile away), I would often wander out into nature and enjoy just being. I would go out to places where I knew that nobody would be able to find me and I would spend hours there. I would forget about time and not tell anyone where I was going. Sometimes I would take my journal and sometimes I would just take myself. I would go out there and just be with God. If I felt like praying, I would pray. If I felt like singing, I would sing. If I would have been a dancer, I'm sure I would have danced. There's just something freeing about being somewhere when NOBODY on earth knows you're there and NOBODY on earth can see you. There's a sense of being able to be completely vulnerable that can't be experienced when someone is watching. That's something that I really struggle with some days here on the bald prairie. You see, even if I'm out in the middle of nowhere, there's a pretty good chance that someone, somewhere, even if they're a couple miles away, can look out their window or out of their car and see you across the fields. There's no way of being completely in solitude out here (at least not that I've found). No trees...too many people. *sigh* It's one of the things that I miss.
The other side of being alone is being without friends.
Lonliness: Being without a support system of people, who know you beyond just the surface.
Loneliness is the other side of being alone. The best I can figure is it's the feeling that is experienced when you don't have those people who know you beyond just the surface. It's when people think they know you but really haven't had the chance to. As opposed to solitude, which gives life and hope, it's a hopeless feeling...much less lively. It's being alone and, instead of feeling free and perfectly yourself, you feel clouded and much less yourself. It's an interesting thing to think about. Both sides of being alone can look exactly the same from the outside, but are complete opposites in definition. I believe both can be experienced at the same time, too... It's such a strange thing to think about.
Solitude vs. Lonliness
Being alone vs. Being alone
Hmm...
Solitude: A spiritual discipline, designed by God, and practiced by Jesus, created as a means of developing and growing an intimate relationship with the Creator.
I have enjoyed practicing solitude very much in my life. When I was in high school, living on the farm (a secluded 10 acres with the closest neighbour being 1/2 a mile away), I would often wander out into nature and enjoy just being. I would go out to places where I knew that nobody would be able to find me and I would spend hours there. I would forget about time and not tell anyone where I was going. Sometimes I would take my journal and sometimes I would just take myself. I would go out there and just be with God. If I felt like praying, I would pray. If I felt like singing, I would sing. If I would have been a dancer, I'm sure I would have danced. There's just something freeing about being somewhere when NOBODY on earth knows you're there and NOBODY on earth can see you. There's a sense of being able to be completely vulnerable that can't be experienced when someone is watching. That's something that I really struggle with some days here on the bald prairie. You see, even if I'm out in the middle of nowhere, there's a pretty good chance that someone, somewhere, even if they're a couple miles away, can look out their window or out of their car and see you across the fields. There's no way of being completely in solitude out here (at least not that I've found). No trees...too many people. *sigh* It's one of the things that I miss.
The other side of being alone is being without friends.
Lonliness: Being without a support system of people, who know you beyond just the surface.
Loneliness is the other side of being alone. The best I can figure is it's the feeling that is experienced when you don't have those people who know you beyond just the surface. It's when people think they know you but really haven't had the chance to. As opposed to solitude, which gives life and hope, it's a hopeless feeling...much less lively. It's being alone and, instead of feeling free and perfectly yourself, you feel clouded and much less yourself. It's an interesting thing to think about. Both sides of being alone can look exactly the same from the outside, but are complete opposites in definition. I believe both can be experienced at the same time, too... It's such a strange thing to think about.
Solitude vs. Lonliness
Being alone vs. Being alone
Hmm...
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